Natasha's Story
Mario was a protective husband and father, and had a real fighting spirit. But when his illness progressed, Thames Hospice was able to provide the help he needed as well as vital support for his family.
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- Natasha's Story
Natasha and her family were introduced to Thames Hospice in May 2022; after her husband, Mario, was diagnosed with Esophageal cancer earlier that year.
Mario was referred to the charity’s Hospice at Home Services. The Hospice Team made regular visits, providing crucial support to help manage his pain and ease symptoms.
Natasha says: “Thames Hospice was really very useful in terms of making sure that the right pain medication was given. There were phone calls and visits, so we could have support with understanding how his pain could be better managed.”
But as Mario's illness progressed, Natasha and her family's lives changed drastically. "Everything the children knew about their world was basically changing, and changing quite rapidly,” Natasha explained. “However, it brought Mario great comfort to know his family were also being supported.”
Their children, Tanisha and Marley, now 17 and 12, were able to benefit from the Hospice’s counselling service which helped them to cope with their feelings surrounding their dad’s illness.
Natasha said: “Having a counsellor that my children could talk things through with, especially things that they can’t control, has been a huge relief for me as a parent”.
It was so important for Natasha that Tanisha and Marley were able to build a relationship with their counsellor. She said: “I wanted the children to build up a rapport with their counsellor so when they did need to start talking about the sensitive issues, they felt comfortable.”
Mario was a very protective father, and had a real fighting spirit, so he never wanted to talk about the fact that he might not win his fight with cancer. But this meant when their counselling sessions started, Tanisha and Marley didn’t know what difficulties might be ahead of them.
“In the first couple of sessions, they didn't know at that point. It was more to build that rapport and get them to talk about the fact that their dad's very sick and any concerns that they had.”
Natasha said: “I did care for Mario at home, but in the last two days, it was becoming increasingly difficult, and I do remember calling the Hospice a few times. And for the last two days, the nurses came to support me at home.” Mario sadly passed away in September 2022.
When talking about the benefits of her own sessions, Natasha said: “I started my counselling shortly after Mario passed away. That really did help me to verbalise and slowly come to terms with my loss. Having someone neutral to talk to and just voice how I'm feeling when I don't necessarily want to talk to others has most definitely been helpful.
“I think when you're the parent that's left, you feel a strong duty of care to protect your children to do all the right things for them, but then in the process you can get lost.”
Since Mario died, the family has continued with individual counselling sessions and attended supportive Hospice events, including the Light Up a Life Service last December.
Natasha said: “We’ve enjoyed meeting other families that are going through similar situations, and the children have had opportunities to talk to other children and that's given them a feeling that they're not alone. Sometimes when you're going through grief and having to go to school there’s not really anyone that truly understands it.
“But coming into the Hospice where there's children that have sadly had similar experiences, I think it just takes away that isolation and loneliness that can come from losing a parent.”
Tanisha, Natasha and Mario’s daughter is using her journey with grief to help others through taking part in The One Show’s Challenge Squad and raising funds for BBC Children in Need – who fund our Children and Families Support Team.
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